My Strengths and Weaknesses as a Writer. (5??)

(Please bear with the first paragraph...I'm just trying to get momentum.)
I use to think I would go into writing as a career. I figured I would start somewhere small, a local newspaper or something, and end up in Vogue or Harper's Bazaar. It all started out with the dream to be a writer who reviews books for a major magazine. I loved to read. I loved to write. It just seemed like perfect sense. Then came my love for fashion. I was constantly engrossed in Vogue, Glamour, In Style, and any other fashion magazine I could get my hands on. I then dreamed of becoming a "fashion editor" in Vogue. I would mix my two passions, English and fashion, and get the job of my dreams. I suddenly was way-laid by a reality check. Millions of girls would dream for that job, but only a few would get it. That is when I realized my dreams were very farfetched. Yes, people would tell me that I could achieve anything and that "the sky's the limit," but I didn't have much faith in myself. My eighth grade year at St. Theresa I had Mrs. Moak. She was the cheerleading sponsor so she liked me fairly enough and she was the English teacher. We wrote at least two essays every week and she did not grade lightly. Looking at where I was in my quest towards my future I was very discouraged. My papers always seemed to look as though there was a murder and my paper just happened to be an innocent bystander, covered in the remains of the murdered. After paper after paper of corrections and little notes of support I became better. My grammar had improved, as did my self-esteem. High school came and suddenly the grammatical assignments came. There was more focus on literature, rather than English. Three years later and I find myself in that position where my grammar almost back to where I was in at the beginning of eighth grade. I don’t feel as confident as I use to.

I guess I can write a decent paper. Most of the training only needs to be slightly brushed up and I could be as good as new. I believe the hardest part is writing a theisis statement. I know that it has to state what the paper is going to attempt to convey. I know that it is crucial in the development of any paper. But I do not know how to write one that doesnt sound harsh and rigid. I feel I can write opinions way better than I can write facts. It seems to me when Im writing about facts my papers seem more choppy. When just writing what I feel, I feel more free and it jsut comes more easily to me.